MARATHON AGONY
Why would anyone run a Marathon? The daughter of a friend of mine summarized the agony of it for her Dad. He was training for a Half marathon and considered running the Full Marathon instead.
Her advice is absolutely correct but you have to enjoy her description of the physical effects of running past your limits. She wrote:
“Dear Dad, I would really caution you about trying to run the whole thing. If you try to run farther than you’re trained to run, your body will revolt and go into shock. “
“Your bad ankle will start to get weak, causing the rest of your foot to overcompensate and making the ball of your foot sore again. Your other leg will overcompensate as well, making your hips out of whack.”
“You’ll get blisters everywhere (nipples, ankles, underwear line) only you won’t believe me….so you won’t bring band-aids.”
“Your legs will give out from the extra mileage and probably swell up so badly you won’t be able to get out of bed for three days. Even if you could, you wouldn’t be able to leave the bedroom because you won’t be able to bend your knees to go downstairs. And forget taking a crap. You can’t begin to sit down. Your quads will be jelly, especially on your good leg.”
“All of this is nothing compared to the last thing that will happen to you. If you keep your blood pressure up for five hours straight and haven’t trained your heart for that, you’ll have a heart attack.”
“Dad, I don’t care if you want to stay in bed with swollen legs and a messed up ankle, but I would appreciate it if you didn’t die from something stupid when you’re only 50! If you’re serious about this and don’t believe me, go consult a Doctor about it. Any sane MD would agree.”
“The guy who initially ran to Marathon, Greece, didn’t die because he was out of shape. He died because he hadn’t trained for a Marathon. This is way more stupid than parachuting. If you really want to run a Marathon, train for it. I’d love to run one with you. Signed (a loving daughter)”
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